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97+ Funny SMS / Jokes Quotes

Best Funny SMS / Jokes quotes, wishes and messages. Read, copy, share, and create image quotes online using Easy2Wish.

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I didn’t fall. The floor just needed a hug.

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My password is “incorrect,” so whenever I forget it, my computer reminds me.

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I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore, and forget at the same time.

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Never trust an atom — they make up everything.

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Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

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I finally stopped drinking for good. Now I drink for evil.

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If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

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My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch… I call it lunch.

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Why is Monday so far from Friday, but Friday so close to Monday?

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I’m not shy, I’m just holding back my awesomeness.

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The road to success is always under construction.

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You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?

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I’m not arguing, I’m passionately expressing my correct opinion.

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My brain has too many tabs open.

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Some days I amaze myself. Other days, I lose my phone while holding it.

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I’m in shape. Round is a shape, right?

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The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

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If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, confuse them with nonsense.

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I’m not lazy, I’m just very relaxed.

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I put “pro” in procrastination.

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